Saturday, September 25, 2010

A choice

Have been very irregular at blogspot, I admit. Hence, no idea how many will read this post. Even then, chances are that I might get a few brickbats for writing the following, but I just have to write it:
He was an exceptionally handsome boy, and a boy with a heart of gold. Very rarely do we come across people who inspire others, heal others without expecting anything in return. He is one such, always has been.
When Ashu had first met him, he was about 10, and she 8.
His parents gave him the best education they could afford, and brought him up with good human values. He gave up his training for a certain lucrative career only because he could not adjust to what was being expected of him: to smoke, was one of them.
All along, he has been a sensitive person; both to the feelings of others as well as his own. Girls and women find him very attractive, and Sanjana met him when they were MBA students. She found in him a very 'good catch' and left no stone unturned to marry him as soon as possible. One of the many things she used in order to impress him was that she came from a family of three sisters and a brother (the brother being the youngest sibling), cleverly indicating that her parents kept on having children till that one son was born! The picture she painted was that of an unappreciated girl now grown into a woman eager to have her identity as an individual.
He was very impressed, although did not want to rush into marriage. Sanjana insisted, saying that her parents were pressurising her.
He and Sanjana got married, when he was 27, and she 25. Although they belonged to different communities (a big issue, in Indian marriages, generally-speaking), his parents supported his decision.
Is he happy in his marriage?
He is miserable; although he tries his best to hide his pain from the world.
Sanjana has no time for either him or for their child. His parents live in a different city because she refuses to adjust with them in any way. When his daughter was 15 months old (the child's mother was then 32), she was sent to his parents who looked after her for 6 months.
Sanjana is a career-idol to many, including some of his relatives.
He is a man with a heart of gold, but has withdrawn himself from others because he is unable to bear the fact that he had chosen the wrong person.
Ashu knows it all even without his saying things openly, and he knows that Ashu knows.
Both he and Ashu remain silent.


SG said...

Very thought provoking post. You may or may not say if this is a true story. I have a feeling that this is a true story. I knew a similar couple. In this incident, she put all sort of “show” to get married to this guy. She would say things like I want to see your childhood pictures. I want to go the places where you grew up as a child. Once they got married, the guy came to know the true personality. She hates her in-laws even thought they go out of the way to please her. They have 2 children. She sends them regularly to the in-laws during weekends to baby sit. The guy drops and pick up the kids. She never comes to the in-laws home. He realizes his mistake. But silent.

I will stop here otherwise I would end up write a post here.

KParthasarathi said...

A touching story.How nice it would have been if the young boy had married Ashu, his childhood friend.Sanjana was a wrong choice.
for the good man.God's ways are inscrutable indeed. He takes delight in such mismatches.
As in the West people should be bold to opt for separation if the partners are totally incompatible and seek the right choice instead of prolonging the misery

Whirlwind said...

Nice one Ayesha. At times in life one is filled with immense remorse or regret for having made a wrong choice and realizing it a tad too late.

Ayesha Parveen said...

@ SG:

Thank you very much for your input. Yes, you have guessed correctly: it is a true story.

Life is funny; sometimes, heart-breaking 'funny', isn't it?

Best wishes.

Ayesha Parveen said...

@ KParthasarathi:

Thanks a lot :) Yes, God's ways are inscrutable; but we trust Him.

May His blessings be with you, always.


Ayesha Parveen said...

@ Whirlwind:

Thanks a lot, Swe :) You are correct; at times, it does seem too late to undo a wrong or a mistake.

Best wishes.

Issam said...

Probably late in commenting. Been disconnected from blogging myself...
Coming to the post, very touching... And so true indeed.
But life does not give you a panoramic view of things all the time. Marriage to work requires effort from both and if there's no way out, safe exit I believe would be the best option. The last resort of course but much better than silent suffering at least.

Ayesha Parveen said...

@ Issam: What you have said is verey true. Thanks a lot for commenting. Best wishes.